On Oct 18 1996, I was involved in a bad car accident, on my way to a convention in Corpus Christi. I was the passenger & my driver fell asleep at the wheel. I hit the open road, apparently 200 ft from were we veered of the road. Some would call me a miracle considering how far I came back. Was told I died & was brought back. FYI I'm only posting this to inform, I do not need or want pity. I am a very cool guy, no where near perfect, but no invalid either. I AM disabled, some may know the following, some may not... Let's set the record straight (so to speak). Disabled people want sex and are interested in sex just like everyone else. Professionals unfortunately help keep damaging myths alive by thinking and stating that people with disabilities can't have sex, or aren't interested or don't want sex. It's your job to help educate people that just because you have a disability you are no different than they are, you just have to do things at times in a different manner than they do. The same goes for BDSM play, disabled people want to play and are interested in play just like everyone else. Disabled people aren't going to be hurt, put in pain or break any more than anyone else. Nothing is more damaging and prejudiced than someone not wanting to play with you just because you're disabled. Approach playing with someone disabled just like you would anyone else. Most people involved in BDSM already talk about the play they are willing to do and lay out the yes, no, maybe and I can do that only if in blah position. Guess what? Same with someone with a disability. COMMUNICATION! There is no disability that can't be worked around with a bit of creativity and effort. My Place My place has never been black & white An unknown path lies before me Sometimes I go with it Sometimes I struggle Sometimes I find I have to break down the proverbial door Where some would hesitate, I would go forward Finding my way through barriers Slipping thru cracks some don’t see There is a part of me who will not cease Until the job is done I didn’t die because I have unfinished business With who or what, I know not But rest assured Whatever it is, I will find it J.Ezell Jan. 2005

My Ideal Person Intelligence, strong will, a little crazy doesn't hurt. I live by the seat of my pants, I only expect my SO to be able to keep up. I am a gr00vy individual.

A few tips for interacting with those who are disabled.
You will find some people very wrapped up in terminology when speaking about those disabled. Definitions are a very personal thing. I suggest when possible, ask the person how they define themselves. That way at least you have an idea where they are coming from, even if you disagree or have a difference of opinions.
I personally don't have a problem being called disabled, handicapped or handicapable and the list goes on and on. But that is just me. What I do object to is NOT being able to go into the same places any person can or folks talking to those with me as if I didn't have a functioning brain or wasn't even there.
So here is what I hope will be some helpful hints for interacting with those disabled.
Talk to the disabled person directly. Don't fall into the rudeness of talking to the people with them as if they are not there or unable to answer for themselves. Treat them as you would any other person.
Shake hands when introduced just like you would with anyone else. Be aware someone with a tracheotomy might not wish to shake your hand since your hand transfers germs and most people with tracheotomies have to use their hand to touch their trach tube to talk. So don't be offended if they don't wish to shake your hand. You might try saying, "is it okay if we shake hands as I understand germs might be an issue?" Someone with a skin problem and even some that have gone through chemotherapy, shaking hands can be painful so again don't be offended if they do not wish to shake your hand.
Ask before helping and then listen to the person in case they need to give you some specific instructions to help them.
Don't be leaning on a person's wheelchair, as that is rude and annoying. It can cause unnecessary movement that could be causing them pain. Don't ask them to hold things for you just because you think they can put it in their lap, that is rude and an invasion of their personal space.
Want to assist a person with a wheelchair? Bend down to eye level and ask permission first or bend down to eye level and ask how can you help. If you are helping a person stand or transfer set the brake. Tell the person you are going to tilt their chair or go over a bump with enough warning so they can prepare themselves. If you are pushing them you should keep at least a wheelchair's length from others. Be sure and watch where you are going so you avoid holes, drain covers, etc.
If you are talking with someone that has difficulty speaking, be patient and look at them as you would anyone else you talk with. Never try to finish their sentences for them. Never pretend to understand. Repeating back what you thought you heard in short separate statements makes it easier. This way they can shake their head yes or no.
Want to assist a person that is blind? Make an offer and wait for them to accept. You should tell them who you are, and if anyone is with you. If you are talking in a group situation it is wise to address the person you are speaking to by name so the visually impaired person can follow the conversation. Don't pet their guide dog without permission. And don't worry if you say see you later.
Talking with a person who is hard of hearing or deaf. Don't shout; look at them so they can see your lips as some can read lips. Don't smoke, eat while talking or have your hand around your mouth. Never talk to the interpreter, speak directly to the person. It is okay to gently tap them on the shoulder or wave your hand to get their attention. And don't worry if you say did you hear about blah?
Teach your children it is not polite to point, laugh or whisper about a disabled person. Parents NEVER tell your children how lucky they are that they aren't disabled.
Want to assist a person on crutches? Be sure and get eye level with them and ask permission first.
By all means NEVER be afraid to ask a question when you are unsure of what to do or how to do something.